


Untitled

by Chunjixbyungie



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game), 裏切りは僕の名前を知っている | Uragiri wa Boku no Namae wo Shitteiru | The Betrayal Knows My Name
Genre: Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-28
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2019-04-29 02:26:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14462994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chunjixbyungie/pseuds/Chunjixbyungie
Summary: If I were to write a book about our story , the title would be " untitled " .





	1. Prologue

If I were to write a book about our story , the title would be " untitled " .

It's just that our love couldn't make it.

It wasn't meant to survive .

Day by day , our conversations grew less and less .

We didn't have anything to talk about . We didn't have anything to do together . It was almost like we forgot how to be together ..

I don't know how .. All of a sudden , like a curse . And the strangest of all is that I still love him and I know he still loves me .

A paradox ..

It's not that I had to leave him because some bad guys were chasing after me and I feared he would get involved in the whole mess .

It wasn't because we fought 24/7 or had different opinions .

It wasn't because we weren't compatible .

It wasn't because of an external factor that forced us to part ways either .

It wasn't like he had to travel abroad and the idea of long-distance relationship did not appeal to us .

It just sort of happened .

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	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is dedicated to each and every relationship out there , be it friendship or love or family bond , that got shattered for no concrete reason .

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It happened in an all too familiar coffee shop - it being my heartbreak - .

 

  
" I never wanted or meant for things to escalate this way .. " he trailed off and I kept silent , never meeting his gaze .

 

I know . I know you never did but what's it good for now ? What difference does it make ? 

 

" But .. " He took a deep breath , preparing himself for the dreadful words I knew were coming next .

His resolution as he said the following words simply destroyed all of me , robbed words and speech of my brain . 

 

" Maybe It's for the best .. We need to break up . "

 

Who said I needed so ?

 

I nearly choked on thin air , unable to process any of it. Even though I’ve always expected such an ending , I was never quite prepared for how it feels like . He forced me on a mental war , his words evoking an awful lot of emotions deep inside my heart . I wanted so bad to plead him with my tears but I found myself staring at my folded hands resting on my lap , staying tight-lipped instead . Maybe I wanted to hide my crestfallen expression , the overflowing despair and disappointment I felt at that moment . I was starting to get worried they would freely pour out of my eyes and I would have to scatter to the ground , collecting them , afraid people would witness such pathetic and vulnerable side of me.

 

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It was raining heavily , I thought , my eyes glued to the sight outside . In such weather , any sane person would normally seek shelter , sticking to home , a blanket draped over them and a mug of hot chocolate in their hands , giving them warmth .  
But I was in no condition to be considered " sane " . Thus , I grabbed my heavy coat and keys before rushing out like a bright sunny day was waiting for me . 

It was freezing cold but I wanted it. I wanted the cold breeze to hit my senses , ruthless , relentless , and merciless . Numb , I wanted to feel that as well.

A shaky breath rippled Its way out of my lungs as I took a moment to study my train of thoughts . I could only describe it as dark and depressive . Which makes me wonder .

Human beings are strange . One moment they feel hunger , the other they cannot stand the idea of eating . One moment they yearn so bad for something but once they get it , that same thing magically starts losing its potential to intrigue them .  
one moment , they love with every being in them , the other they watch the same love wither before their eyes , like it never meant a thing.

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A love so deep its end is drowning.  
Only then did I understand those words.  
Missing you comes in waves tonight and I’m .. drowning.

 

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	3. A bullet would have hurt less

 

 

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A bullet would have hurt less .

 

 

 

 

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What if you get to the point where " fake " is what first comes to mind when you think of love , and not just in a romantic sense . What if such emotion feels foreign now that you can't imagine yourself loving someone genuinely and by the same token , you will never allow yourself to believe someone genuinely loves you , as a friend , family member , or anyone ..

 

What if ?

 

 

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When Zen finally decided to get out of his cocoon and work on a song with Brave sound records , he was in for a surprise , in the least of terms . Because now standing in front of him is the very reason why he curled himself in a cocoon to begin with .

 

Their eyes met briefly , too brief to scan each other's whole figure after so much time has passed .

 

 _Of course_ .. They both cursed inwardly for not seeing that coming . A songwriter and a singer .. what are the odds ?

 

As minutes dragged by , many other people piled in , crowding the room and -thankfully- acting as a distraction . However , Kang Dong-chul , the founder of Brave brothers , assumed that they didn't personally know each other so he made it his job to do just that .

 

It was awkward and hurried but Dong-chul noticed the feeling of unease coating the air and recognition swirling in both of their eyes . He couldn't help but ask if they knew each other beforehand . To which he got a simple but concise response .

 

" We do . " They both said , unwilling to disclose any more information regarding that matter .

 

Luckily , he took the hint and decided to get to work .

 

 

Rigid and tense , that's how the ex lovers spent the first five minutes or so until the need to act professional forced them to focus on more pressing matters . Soon enough , they were working in a more relaxed manner and almost forgot about their unexpected barging in each other's lives once again . That is until Jumin announced he would be leaving .

Apparently , Zen's mind had yet to realize the fact when Jumin takes his leave , he no longer implies that both of them are heading back home . Because he simply no longer existed in the equation . And now the white haired male found himself standing , inwardly struggling for an excuse as belated realization hit him as hard as the questioning looks his colleagues had been giving him ever since he stood up , unconsciously making a fool of himself .

 

They didn't voice it out but their perplexed stares did that on their behalf . _Where are you going ?_ That must have been the silent question running in all of their heads .

 

Jumin obviously noticed the younger's inner turmoil and wasted no time to interfere .

" Zen , you said you had something to tell me in private . "

Came the rescue ..

However , Zen recalled no such thing and his innocent expression showed nothing but surprise .

He obviously had not said such thing , that much they could tell .

 

 _Smells like a cover up_ , they all thought suspiciously , wondering what kind of relationship or history those two shared .

 

 

Zen could only send a sheepish smile to everyone present before he rushed after Jumin who was smart enough to step out of the room before people got even more suspicious of the whole situation .

 

 

As soon as they were alone and out of the building , Zen yelled " What are you doing ? Not letting me move on yet not getting back together .. What's it that you want ? I don't take pleasure in such game of yours . "

 

The younger was seething and didn't bother hiding it . His tone , gesture , and facial features joined forces - caught in the middle of a war he wished was not his to fight - . He did not appreciate the fact Jumin helped him like that earlier .

 

 

" Neither do I ! Plus , it's not a game . I hope you are not ignorantly thinking that you are the only one hanging on thin air . In case you didn't notice , I haven't moved on either ! " Jumin snapped back , unconsciously admitting what he should have never revealed . You can't blame him though . Who would be able to think straight after meeting their ex-lover so suddenly ?

 

 

The songwriter let out a scoff-like chuckle , averting his eyes elsewhere  before proceeding to give the elder a piece of his mind . What Jumin had just said made no sense at all . How dare he make it look like he was a victim when he was the one to end it all between them !

 

" In case you forgot , the one deciding to break up was none other than you ! " Zen exclaimed as he pointed accusing fingers towards the elder , expression provoked.

 

" And you didn't Fight it ! " The normally cool singer fumed up , realizing a little too late that in the middle of their blame game , he ended up making his own excuse fire back at him .

 

Crimson eyes widened at the sudden yell and the hidden meaning of the words altogether .

 

 

 

 

" Wh .. What ? " Confused , Zen stuttered and shook his head softly . Whereas Jumin winced , already imagining the barrage of accusations Zen was gonna throw at him .

 

 _Too late now .._ He had slipped with his tongue and nothing could change that . God ! He was never gonna hear the end of it . Brilliant !

He had screwed up . Royally !

 

 

" Was it all a game to you ? Proposing we break up just to test my reaction ? " The silverette paused long enough to retrieve his scattered thoughts and dispersed emotions but not enough to allow the other male time to respond .

 

 

" What kind of level did you steep to ? " Utter disbelief coating his voice , Zen eyed Jumin 's figure as if trying to come up with an answer , a plausible one . He even took a step back , feeling betrayed as the old scars opened anew , so fresh it stung .

But he wasn't the only one hurting .

A flicker of sadness and disappointment rippled in Jumin's eyes as he retorted back " What kind of level did YOU steep to , to think of me that lowly ? "

 

 

 

 

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_Impeccable white snow covered the windows and every inch it could reach , making everything feel snow soft and mysteriously pure . Layers and layers of snow blanketed the streets , every inch , shelf , and roof , painting the perfect Christmas-like picture - ._

 

 

_The snow , Like a possessively desperate lover going out of their way to make sure their beloved never left their side , allowed no one and nothing  the way out once buried . Simply put , the moment you get buried , you are buried for good ._

 

 

_The gentle Breeze flew past trees , making them shift back and forth , only to turn into powerful wind gushing by , its sound fading in and out , filling the city with a distant cold echo ._

 

_A Pleasant scenery .. On the outside, that is ._

 

_Zen was on the phone speaking to one of his friends , more like complaining about how freezing cold it was ._

 

" _Yea ! It's biting cold here . I'm nearly freezing ! " As soon as he said that , a pair of warm hands cradled his whole being ._ _He couldn't help but lean in , appreciating the sudden yet welcome warmth emitting from his lover ._

 

 

 

 

 

He sat curled on the sofa , gazing at the furnace with empty eyes and soon found himself trapped , walking down the memory lane . He had been craving warmth but now it merely felt as though an extra heat draped over his shoulders , neck , and entire being , almost suffocating him in its vice like grip . He couldn't help the dark twist of emotions invading his heart , making it lurch and nearly rot at the now bittersweet memory .

 

A weak smile etched itself on his face as he ruefully recalled such times .

 

Other than that , however , he showed no sign of grief . How long has it been ? Weeks ? Months ? A year ? He wasn't sure but it felt like a lifetime since they .. broke up . It still left a bitter aftertaste , much to his chagrin .

 

Shivering as he longed for the lost sensations , the tender touch , the forgotten warmth , Zen curled himself in a ball , burying his face in his knees . And then ... he silently wept .

 

So lonely ..

 

He felt like someone had just shoved daggers in his heart , mercilessly impaling so deep it actually felt so real that he panted , feeling everything in his being clamoring for his lover as hot tears flowed down his face painfully slow , like the act itself demanded so much of the energy he didn't even have . It stung terribly , in every single aspect . Who knew that the wheel of fate would spin and they would end up crossing paths again ..

 

 

 

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Jumin walked down the hallway of Brave brothers building , with another guy called Jiho , heading to the soda can machine to bring refreshments for the whole staff .

 

Out of kindness , Jumin offered to go . But secretly , he needed some fresh air away from his ex-lover . How was he supposed to act for the love of Lucifer ?

 

A groan next to him attracted his attention .

Jumin turned his head and looked at Jiho questioningly .

 

The guy spoke up , explaining " Oh man . I can't find what Zen wanted me to get him . He needed some ice tea or something . Oh well . I will just get him this one . " Jiho reached for a flavor Zen hated but he didn't know that . Only Jumin did .

 

 

" No ! " the brunette exclaimed , preventing Jiho from reaching the can .

 

Startled and confused , the other male stopped moving right then and there , not knowing where he'd gone wrong .

 

 

 

Before he could ask though , Jumin dropped another flavor in the bag , mumbling " This will do . "

 

He soon reprimanded himself and inwardly face palmed . One of those days , people were going to find out because of how obvious he was being . But really . He couldn't just let the guy get Zen a flavor he hated , could he ?

 

When they got back to the studio , the brunette singer started handing everyone their drinks whilst Jiho handed the other half , including a certain silver haired songwriter . The pout on Zen's face as he realized it was not his favorite flavor made an unconscious smile creep its way to Jumin's lips . _At least , it was not something he hated_.

 

 

Thankfully , that Jiho guy didn't end up revealing how Jumin helped him pick up another flavor for Zen . The brunette definitely needed no more awkwardness with the younger . They were doing a good job pretending nothing was wrong and all , but that didn't mean they were back to normal , let alone comfortable enough to have long conversations . Any , in fact .

 

 

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Noise , crowds , disco lights .. Jumin made his way to his friend , the bartender , and ordered his favorite .

 

You may ask why ? What brings him here ? Why drink ? And you wouldn't get a solid answer , just a shrug and pursed lips curling downwards .

 

 

Jumin didn't know why exactly he felt the need to go and drink .

Maybe it had all crashed down on him at once ..

Or maybe the tremendous effort he put in work finally took a toll on him that he needed a respite from it ..

Maybe he just wanted to feel numb for few hours , stop thinking about a certain songwriter and let loose all the emotions he normally couldn't in front of the people he knew .

 

 

He , however , was soon snapped out of his thoughts as he heard an extremely loud crash accompanied with people shouting and a colorful stream of profanities resonating about the whole place .

 

 _That is too loud , even for a bar_ , Jumin thought absently . It was then that he realized he was in fact halfway gone , drank too much .

 

" Hey , man . what's that about ? " He turned his head and asked the bartender .

 

" It's that guy again , Luka Crosszeria . He has a bad reputation - women , drug abuse , fights - , you name it , causes troubles every time and ends up storming his way outside lest he gets kicked out . "

 

Jumin turned his head to the crowd , tried to follow Kim's line of sight and see who that Luka was .

 

 

" I have always thought he looked quite familiar and now I know why . you guys share a lot of resemblance , Jumin . "

 

 

The one being addressed narrowed his eyes , trying to take a good look at the guy and found out that indeed , he resembled him . Jumin's eyebrows shot up in amusement at that , but  the alcohol soon got to him and he found himself feeling dizzy , his vision blurring too much . He faintly realized the fact his friend was talking to him but none of the words seemed to register in his fogged up brain .

 

 

 

 

 

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The next day , Jumin woke up feeling delirious but was relieved to see he was home . Kim must have helped him out .

 

Rubbing his face sluggishly , Jumin sighed and spent few more minutes just sitting on the bed before finally getting up .

 

He got himself a sprite bottle to ease the hangover effects and prepared a simple breakfast - toast and fried eggs for two - . Wait what ?

For tw-

 

 

" Fuck ! " He slammed a hand on the counter and the other on his forehead .

 

 

His mind insisted - out of routine - to do just that , to make him prepare breakfast for two and remind him of that which he could no longer have .

 

 

Staring at the food as if it was the one to blame , he sighed deeply and rubbed his temple before taking the plates and going to the living room where he flopped down on the couch and decided the television would no doubt brighten his mood . which turned out just fine since it distracted him enough to make him unconsciously eat despite his previously bitter mood .

 

Before he knew it , Jumin realized the rest of the day had passed by with him either spacing out , sleeping , or simply doing nothing productive . A wave of boredom and loneliness surged through his being at the thought .

 

 

 

 

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 _Boredom and loneliness , a monster lurking in the shadows tearing you up from the inside out_ . Zen concluded .

_It was about two weeks ago that his world came crumbling down over his head and he was left to nurse the pain of being abandoned for no solid reason ._

 

 _He had been locking himself in his apartment ever since , trying to process the fact he was really single . That's how he ended up scrolling past the posts he’d saved on Facebook until he reached year 2001 .._ _The number felt like an arrow shot straight to his heart .._ _He inched closer to his laptop screen and kept staring at the number , vision blurring in the process ._

 

 _A bitter chuckle cut through the silence ._ _How lonely must he have been to end up going that far ?_ _How come he had nothing else to do ?_

 

_That was not the first time he caught himself deep in a world of pain and loneliness though . He could still remember the time he found himself clutching his backpack too tight as if seeking comfort from it ._

 

 

 

 

 

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Sighing at the state he was reduced to , Jumin decided to take a walk . But he definitely didn't expect chancing upon such scene as he strolled down the mall . His mood that he just managed to improve few minutes ago instantly darkened as he took in the sight in front of him .

 

A very familiar silverette together with another familiar brown haired guy sat on a table , having a date , as it seemed . Jumin seethed . It was that guy he saw in the bar the day before , Luka Crosszeria , sitting with Zen and shamelessly wiping his thumb on the former’s lips , obviously enjoying an excuse to touch him . Jumin knew Zen wouldn't just let anyone do that unless .. unless it was his boyfriend . The realization hit him like a goddamn punch in the gut ..

 

 

 

 

Boyfriend ?

 

 

 

 

Zen got himself a new boyfriend ? and who ? A player ? A troublemaker ..

 

He wanted so much to go there , punch the hell out of that Luka , yell at him to scat , and tell Zen everything .

 

He knew what he saw . The day before , that guy had a girl clinging to him the whole time and he wasn't fighting it . On the contrary , he was encouraging her. Put plainly , he was cheating on Zen !

 

 

 

_Are you sure that's the only reason you want him to break up with Luka ?_

_Or is it because you can't stand the idea of him dating another ?_ A voice in the back of his mind quipped .

 

 

Should he tell Zen later ? Or would it be better if he never got himself involved with Zen again ? After all , it's none of his business who the silverette dated .

 

 

Unbeknownst to him , a certain silverette's gaze landed on him . The first emotion to show on Zen's face was utter surprise . Having Jumin witness his date with Luka felt oddly wrong . Why though ? Did he really want the brunette to believe he was still single so he could make a move on him ?

 

 

 

 

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One day , Luka went to Zen's apartment and spent most of the time there , like usual . But he knew the night would be different . He was starting to get seriously attracted to the silverette and wanted to confront him about it . He also wanted to confess and ask for forgiveness .

 

 

They were sitting on the couch , almost cuddling , until Luka took things a little too far and nearly undressed Zen , who shied away instantly .

 

Deep inside , the silverette felt horrified by his own actions .

 

Why ? Why couldn't he let Luka proceed further ?

 

 

" I.. Zen , I'm sorry . I know we agreed not to but .. I can't help feeling attracted to you . Give us a chance ." Luka pleaded , trying to take Zen's hands in his and convey his feelings . But the silverette started shaking his head in disbelief and disapproval . He didn't want that . He didn't want a serious relationship .

 

 

Zen wasn't even paying attention to the elder's words because in that moment , he was in a world of his own .

 

Luka though , was having none of it . He wanted Zen in every way possible and for that to happen , he needed to forge his way to the younger's heart and mind . It wasn't going to be easy though , especially considering his playboy nature .

 

 

" Listen to me . I'm serious . That's why you must know I did .. cheat on you . But we can start anew , with no secrets . I have always been a player but no more . I'm being honest with you , Zen . "

 

Laughing in pure misery , the younger fought to compose himself . He didn't feel betrayed at all and that was .. odd .

 

Even now I can only think of how it would have been like if it was Jumin talking to me , asking for forgiveness ..

 

 

" No , Luka . It's not your fault .. Anyone would do that and I won't be bothered in the slightest . " After few minutes , Zen finally responded in a calm , albeit broken tone .

 

The elder blinked , confused . He and Zen have both agreed to date just to forget past relationships .

They have agreed to be comfortable around each other , but with no actual love involved , no sleeping either . Until just now when he made his move , advancing on Zen , suddenly saying he wanted to take things seriously and cornering the unsuspecting silverette who found himself frozen at such escalation .

 

Zen didn't know why but he had no ,  no and once more , no Feelings for the guy . When he first agreed to be Luka's boyfriend , he did it for two reasons ; to forget Jumin and convince himself he could go on .

 

 _Yea . that' why you chose someone who shares a great resemblance with him ._ Something inside him mocked .

 

 

 

Why couldn't he feel anything for Luka ?

 

 

Because he really didn't have romantic feelings towards him or was it because the guy wasn't Jumin ?

If him not being Jumin was the reason then no matter how much Zen tried to move on and dated 100000 others , a certain brunette would still occupy his mind , heart , and life .

And if that was the case , he was doomed , pretty terribly doomed at that .

 

No.. That was not gonna happen . He would make sure of it . Jumin was not allowed in his life ever again .

 

 

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**Author's Note:**

> Hello mysme fandom ~  
> I'm back with yet another prewritten fic ! lol  
> I told ya I'm gonna be flooding the fandom with my old works converted from other fandom until I get an exclusive idea for mystic messenger .  
> Meanwhile , I hope you enjoy this ! 
> 
> Xoxo  
> chunjixbyungie  
> Also known as Zerovk


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